News & Insights

Source: Newsweek

Dear Newsweek, My name is Alicia and I am the mother of five amazing minor children and two adult sons. I divorced my husband 3 years ago, and due to Covid, things took much longer and we actually separated long before our divorce was finalized.

Anyway, while married I was a stay-at-home mom and home-schooled my kiddos. My ex-husband worked full-time and was generally uninvolved in day-to-day life. 

However, as time went on, I realized my ex-husband was causing a lot of damage to our children and myself. I realized that he was financially, emotionally, and spiritually abusing us, so I left.

He then made it his mission to punish me for leaving. He went on a smear campaign and isolated me from all of my friends and family. “Making things as difficult as he could so I would come crawling back to him”—his exact words.

Part of his revenge was to seek 50/50 custody, which he was awarded because at the time I was still afraid of him and easily intimidated so I was not able to fully advocate for myself or my children. Since then, it has been a battle.

All of the abusive behaviors that were present when we were married are still present now, but because he doesn’t abuse our children physically the court has done absolutely nothing to protect our children.

Despite him having [court] involvement four separate times for throwing our youngest daughter down the stairs, dragging our oldest daughter down the stairs and through the house by her arms, break-checking our youngest daughter so hard she had a bruised and swollen face for two weeks, and leaving our children in a whole other state with a woman he just met and that they knew for a few days.

His abuse is to the extent that his new wife left him after only being married to him for two months because she feared for her children’s safety.

Even still, the judge in our small town will do nothing to protect our children, or even order him to attend real therapy or parenting classes.

One of the most troubling behaviors that he regularly engages in is bullying our LGBTQIA+ daughter. He tells her that being a homosexual is as bad as being a pedophile. He tells her that she is evil and against God—he has even worked with his pastor to arrange very hateful anti LGBTQIA+ sermons. He treats her like a maid and cook when she is with him and makes sure to let her know that she disgusts and disappoints him because she identifies as LGBTQIA+ and listens to the band Ghost. All of this continues to wear on my daughter’s mental health and yet still no one will do anything.

He is treated as if he is a model father and the family court continues to turn a blind eye to everything he does. He uses his religion as a reason to get away with his abuse, stating that he has not only a right, but an obligation, to tell our daughter the things he does because she has turned her back on the Lord.

No one seems to want to hold him accountable and help out our children. He has blocked me from putting them in therapy, receiving immunizations, attending doctor visits, and taking medication. All because it’s against his beliefs and western medicine is witchcraft.

I hired a Guardian Ad Litem who found he was abusive and that it was in the kids’ best interest to be with me full-time and limit his involvement until he completed therapy and parenting classes, but the court also ignored that. I have spent THOUSANDS on attorneys and have only landed in the same spot every single time.

So now, I am hopeful that if I make it public how badly the County Court is failing our children, maybe something might be done for them.

As a healthy parent, he would deserve 50/50 time with our kids, but until then I don’t think he should get it just because it’s his “right.” 

Alicia, Unknown

Newsweek‘s “What Should I Do?” offers expert advice to readers. If you have a personal dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice on relationships, family, friends, money and work and your story could be featured on WSID at Newsweek.

‘Abusive Relationships Impact Self-Confidence…You Need To Protect Yourself and Children’

Lisa Pion-Berlin, Ph.D., is a licensed hypnotherapist and CEO of Parents Anonymous.

You are a very courageous woman to speak out about your family situation to expose the injustice and harm to your family. Do not minimize what that takes. Stop blaming yourself for not advocating harder because you felt so insecure.

Physically and psychologically abusive relationships impact our self-confidence and wear us down so we cannot fight back. Twenty-five years of research into “battered woman” or “battered person” syndrome shows this.

It is understandable that you and your children are in a very difficult and abusive situation. Your focus needs to be on going forward by continuously and relentlessly protecting yourself and your children.

First of all, insults, threats or bodily harm needs to be reported and documented with the police, schools and your own doctors. Clear and complete documentation cannot be overemphasized—print out and save every email, text and voicemail regarding any threats or evidence of abuse.

Also, make copies of all medical records and other entities for your file. Take photographs of the physical damage your children have endured. Make sure you take them to the doctor, as they take pictures and continue to make CPS reports.

It is brave you are making this public. So many parents are afraid when the courts and systems are not helping or protecting children. Make sure you have support for yourself. You cannot stay strong without seeking counseling and surrounding yourself with supportive friends and family.

Also, seek counseling for your children so they can deal with their underlying feelings related to these traumas. Therapists and counselors are mandated reporters. Prejudice and discrimination exist in all institutions sworn to help you protect your children from abuse and neglect.

Even though you have paid for lawyers, if you feel they haven’t helped, you can seek free legal counsel. You may also want to contact your newly elected congressperson or U.S. senators. Senator Stabenow has district staff to help constituents and she is a dedicated social worker and advocate herself.

Local politics are tough to deal with, but the safety, health and well-being of your entire family is at stake. Continue to reach out because asking for help is a sign of strength. You can also call the National Parent Helpline 855-427-2736, operated by Parents Anonymous® (raisingfuture.org).

‘The Safety Of You and Your Children Is The Number One Priority’

Dr. Faisal Tai, MD, is a psychiatrist and the CEO of PsychPlus. 

I’m very sorry to hear about your serious dilemma with your ex-husband. As the mother of five minor children, I am sure that you have your hands more than full and that this conflict only makes taking care of your family—and yourself—10 times harder.

When I hear about all the legal steps you’ve taken to try and improve your situation through the courts and government agencies, it is disheartening that you have not been able to make more progress.

As a psychiatrist, I also would strongly encourage you to seek professional assistance to safeguard the emotional well-being of you and your children. It will be fundamental to your health and well-being, and your quality of life, in the years ahead.

I would recommend that you contact the Child Welfare Medical and Behavioral Health unit for your local county.

Amongst many other resources, they will have a comprehensive list of support services across the state that might be of great assistance.

I wish you the best of luck as you continue to advocate for yourself and your children.

Date: February 11, 2023

A new study looks at the success of the national Parents Anonymous Parent and Youth Helpline and asks how other hotlines can make a real connection with California families.

Researchers from Arizona State University and the University of Cincinnati presented the results on June 9 at a sociology conference in Scotland.

Elizabeth Harris, faculty associate at Arizona State University and the study’s co-author, said data show the helpline makes a measurable difference for callers.

“We have established very clearly that people who call that helpline do end the call feeling more solution-oriented, feeling more positive than they started out,” Harris explained. “And it’s a 30-minute intervention.”

The study found it makes a big difference when counselors with master’s degrees answer the phone lines. They are trained in what’s called connective labor: creating the unique spark that happens when people see, hear and recognize each other in an authentic way.

People can reach the helpline at 855-427-2736 or visit NationalParentYouthHelpline.org.

Harris noted experts on the helpline take special care to make sure their referrals are well vetted.

“A huge amount of infrastructure work has to go into making sure that when people are referred to places, that they actually get help,” Harris emphasized. “Because there is no faster way to leave people frustrated than just turning them in circles.”

The peer-reviewed study has been published by the Design Research Society. The authors praised Parents Anonymous’ commitment to analyzing data from all calls in order to continuously improve the quality of service.

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Today at the State Capitol, parents and advocates rallied for the continued funding of what they call a vital tool for families in crisis.

Parents Anonymous hosted a press conference to call for sustained funding for California Parent and Youth Helpline in the new state budget.

The issue, depression, anxiety, bullying, immigration issues. We answer all those kinds of calls, texts, and we need this lifeline to continue. And so we’re seeking $15 million over The issue, depression, anxiety, bullying, immigration issues. We answer all those kinds of calls, texts, and we need this lifeline to continue. And so we’re seeking $15 million over The issue, depression, anxiety, bullying, immigration issues. We answer all those kinds of calls, texts, and we need this lifeline to continue.

Supporters of the California Parent and Youth Helpline are pleading with lawmakers to restore its funding after Gov. Gavin Newsom left it out of his May budget proposal, released May 14.

Last year, lawmakers initially approved the funding but cut it at the last minute. Parents Anonymous, which runs the helpline, is asking the legislature to commit $5 million a year for the next three years.

Lisa Pion-Berlin, president and CEO of Parents Anonymous, which runs the helpline, said the loss of state funding means fewer counselors manning the phones and longer wait times.

“We have a 40% abandonment rate,” Pion-Berlin pointed out. “That means that 40% of the Californians who try to call us, text us, or live chat, they abandon the call or the text because they’re holding too long because we don’t have the capacity to respond to them.”

People can still call the National Parent Youth Helpline at 855-427-2736, which gets $2 million a year in federal funds and can go to the hotline’s website. Trained counselors guide families as they confront a wide range of crises, including bullying, domestic violence and thoughts of suicide. Since 2020, the helpline has supported almost 130,000 callers and made close to 90,000 referrals.

Pion-Berlin argued the state should consider good mental health and emotional support to be a basic need.

“This program works,” Pion-Berlin asserted. “It’s the only helpline that’s proven that from the beginning to the end of the call, 85% of the callers feel more positive, more hopeful and have a solution-focused attitude.”

The program no longer offers online support groups but funds from the Los Angeles County Department of Mental Health support in-person therapy. The legislature has until June 15 to approve a balanced budget.

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U.S. Rep. Norma Torres introduced the National Parent & Youth Helpline Act on Friday which establishes support and prevention, ensuring that parents, caregivers, children and youth have access to timely, trusted assistance to navigate challenges.

Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin joined CBS Los Angeles this morning to talk about the bill. View the segment below.

If you are interested in being an Endorser of the bill, contact Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin.

Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin, CEO of Parents Anonymous, Inc. joins Amber Freeman, host of Bloom, to discuss ways in which people can become less reliant on our phones in order to increase connection.

Families are not just managing screen time anymore. We are living in a digital-first world where social media never sleeps, AI is becoming part of school and work, and a phone can quietly replace real connection at home. Many parents tell me they feel like they are competing with devices for their child’s attention, while also feeling pulled by their own notifications, work messages and endless to-do lists.

We’re not aiming to “win” our family in 2026 against technology. We’re aiming to establish healthy home culture where relationships come first and tech knows its place. We have collectively lost our way, where the priority is human connection.

Here are realistic ways to come together as a family while balancing the digital push and pull of everyday life.

Start with phone-free micro-moments

Don’t try to fix everything at once. Most families find this turns into month one “going cold turkey” that fizzles out by week two. Focus on daily phone-free micro-moments, such as:

• The first 10 minutes after your child gets home from school. Talk about something important that happened—funny or serious.
• No phones for everyone at dinner.
• The last 10 minutes before bedtime.
• During the car ride to extra-curricular activities.

Read the full article on Psychreg

Leaders from the California Parent and Youth Helpline are in Sacramento today asking policymakers to restore the program’s funding, after the Governor’s January budget proposal was released.

The helpline has helped millions of Californians since it started in 2020 but last year, the state cut funding at the last minute.

Lisa Pion-Berlin, president and CEO of the nonprofit Parents Anonymous, which runs the helpline, said they had to lay off all their counselors dedicated to California.

“The impact has been that 40% of the callers, we cannot reach,” Pion-Berlin explained. “We cannot meet the demand from the Californians who call us. We cannot. We are calling people back as fast as we can, but we have a very high abandonment rate because we don’t have the staffing we had to cover separately, Californians.”

Read the full article on Public News Service

Are you concerned about your child’s relationship with social media? Feeling lost on how to set healthy boundaries or support their mental health in today’s digital world? You’re not alone!

Watch this episode to get practical, real-life tips for handling your child’s social media use without constant worry or power struggles. Learn what to pay attention to, how to set limits that don’t turn into daily fights, and how to keep conversations open even when your child shuts down. You’ll leave this episode with a clearer sense of when to step in, when to give space, and where to turn if you need extra support.

In this eye-opening episode of M.E.S.H., host Pamela Brewer sits down with Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin, CEO of Parents Anonymous, licensed hypnotherapist, and social worker. Dr. Lisa shares invaluable insights on parenting in the age of technology—covering everything from how to know if your child is using social media too much, building strong relationships with teens, handling pushback on setting limits, and ways to recognize when your child needs more help.

Key Topics Covered:

✔️ How to set healthy social media limits without constant pushback

✔️ Signs to watch for if social media is affecting your child’s mood, behavior, or well-being

✔️ Ways to keep communication open and build trust—even during tough conversations

✔️ Free, confidential support and mental health resources available through Parents Anonymous

If your teen is constantly FaceTiming, group-chatting, gaming with friends, and replying to 100+ Snap streaks a day, “lonely” might be the last word you’d use to describe them. But research shows otherwise: Gen Z — the most digitally connected generation in history — is also the loneliest.

According to GWI’s global survey, “Eight in 10 Gen Z respondents (80%) agree they’ve felt lonely in the past 12 months,” and strikingly, “The most connected generation in history is also the loneliest.” The CDC reports that “4 in 10 students had persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness,” a sign that emotional disconnection is becoming more common — even among teens who appear socially active.

Experts see it every day. Licensed counselor Sarah Whitmire, LPC-S, explains that “the lack of face-to-face interaction, which is crucial for building empathy and emotional bonds, leaves many teens feeling isolated despite being constantly connected.”Report ad

And social media heightens the pressure. As Dr. Lisa Pion-Berlin, ACSW, ACHT and CEO of Parents Anonymous, told us, “Social media creates a platform for comparison — teens view idealized representations of others’ lives, which makes them feel isolated and inadequate.”

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It was fitting that Pomona Valley Hospital Medical Center, with its trauma center that has seen so many victims of gun violence over the years, served as the starting point for the October 9 Pomona Peace Walk.

The march, hosted by House of Ruth, the City of Pomona, Project Hope California, and others, drew dozens for the 1.1-mile route from the hospital to House of Ruth’s outreach office at 599 N. Main St., Pomona.

Among them was Sonja Gonzales from Parents Anonymous, who carried a poster with photos of Jeannette Pacheco, a victim of gun violence.

“Her life was taken by her partner,” Gonzales said. “He shot and killed her in the streets of Pomona on Mission, by the car wash.” The date on Gonzales’s poster was May 23, 2024. “She was my sober living sister. I was in recovery with her. And unfortunately, she went back to a disease, and she lost her life.”

Gonzales said she keeps Pacheco’s memory alive with the work she does at Parents Anonymous, a Claremont nonprofit that offers family strengthening programs.

“I get to help people every day that are in the same shoes that her and I were in,” Gonzales said. “I just get to strive and push forward, to know that her life isn’t in vain. She didn’t die in vain because I get to keep her memory alive with every person that I help not end up like her.”

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